The Four Horsemen on Shetland Ponies

I read yesterday that Notre Dame has scheduled to play UMass in football in the near future. That's the University of Massachusetts. ND vs. UMass, in football? Are you kidding me? What, were the Little Sisters of the Poor already scheduled for that weekend? How can a legendary powerhouse like Notre Dame sink so low as to schedule a team that probably can't beat itself in an intrasquad scrimmage? The answer has to be what the answer always is when you can't figure out why things are the way they are.......MONEY. Not just the money Notre Dame makes for a regular season trouncing of an unheard of football entity, but the money that comes from scheduling 10 patsies in a season along with USC, Michigan and Michigan State, so that the worst record you end up with is 10-3 and you go to a bowl game that will pay the school $8 million for their appearance. As I said, when in doubt it's ALWAYS about the greenbacks.

Reminds me when Mo Vaughan was up for a big contract renewal with the Red Sox. He made the famous and often repeated statement that, “It's not about the money.” when asked about what was most important for him regarding his next contract. “It's about respect and feeding my family. It's not about the money.” Usually, these idiots will also throw in some lame comment about “they just want to win” or “I want to work closer to my family.” The last prevarication was uttered by Roger Clemens, who happens to live in Katy, Texas just before he signed with the Toronto Blue Jays for top dollar. Last time I checked Toronto wasn't even in the same country as Katy, but then again Texas is a big state. Why can't they just be honest and say they want to make as much money as they can in their careers and will play for the highest bidder. Heck, I'd admire anyone who was honest enough to say that instead of the BS they try to pass off on the public.

I think baseball should start their season after the hockey playoffs are over. I turned off the Bruins playoff game on Saturday (a tough loss) and turned on the Red Sox game. Are you kidding me? Baseball should be the officially licensed sport for Insomniacs Unlimited. Ball 1.....ball 2....foul ball, strike 1.....ball 3.......strike two......routine two hop grounder to short....out #1. And you have to repeat that at least 27 times per game......YIKES. Now don't get me wrong, I used to love base ball before (you guessed it) money took over. When the big boys started getting paid millions for playing the game, the owners said we have to make millions from advertising to pay for them. So we have to slow the game down in order to get more advertising in to pay the bills and make a little profit for ourselves. When I was a kid, baseball games lasted 2 hours, maybe 2 and a half hours. And Ted Williams made $100,000 a year. Now a typical Red Sox game, I swear lasts at least 3 plus hours (sometimes 4 if it's a Yankee game) and if the players aren't making $10,00,000 a year, they're a loser. Three and a half hours watching Kevin Youkilis foul off fastballs and sweating profusely. It could be worse, you could be forced to watch an NBA game from start to finish....talk about irrelevant. Effort is not the theme of the NBA. But the NBA is good for the tattoo business and the bail bondsmen.

Playoff hockey and pro football clearly are the best simply because players can't play either without putting forth their maximum effort. You only get to see pro football once a week but playoff hockey is every night for two months. I don't know if you know who Mike (Doc) Emerick is. He is the announcer for a number of NHL games. I challenge you to watch a game, any playoff game that he announces and you will jump out of your chair several times just from the excitement in Mike's voice as he conveys the high drama taking place before your very eyes. He is clearly the best, by far. I don't even know who is in second place.

Sports used to be good. Now there are at least 30 teams in every league of every sport. ESPN is telling you every day ad nauseum about every dunk, every goal, every run and every hit that took place in the past ten minutes. And then they have to “break down” everything like any moron can't figure out what they just saw. It used to all mean something, now it's all run by accountants and business managers.

The only thing worse is sports talk radio but I'll leave that for another rant.

My advice to you after the NHL playoffs are over.........go read a book.

Until next time.....